Insecurities from past relationship creeping up
I’ve been single for the past years due to a relationship that went sour after distance was introduced into the mix. Trust issues arose and I felt at the time that she didn’t value me and thoughts of jealousy started creeping up when she spent time on end without saying anything. We broke up after trying to keep a relationship in which we didn’t trust each other and we both got out of it really hurt.
However, I recently met a person that not only made me feel comfortable sharing my real self with her but also made me want to risk being hurt because I think I can be really happy with her. Two problems arose, the first is that distance will also be a factor in this relationship if we move forward. I thought hard about that and came to the conclusion that I still want to try but yesterday she completely shut me out after a night out and it made me feel exactly like my ex made me feel. All the anxiety crept back up and although I trust this girl more than my ex and she has given me no reason not to trust her (and has given me reasons to trust her) I couldn’t help but feel shut out, helpless and alone again.
Are my insecurities just preventing me from being happy with someone who I think is really special? Should I take a step back and disconnect myself from her for a while? Or should I just end it now before any of us get hurt even more?
She also has some trust issues where she shuts down the world when she is feeling anxious and I really hated that behaviour from my ex but I didn’t trust her. I try to rationalise that it’s not the same and eventually calm myself down because I know she wouldn’t do anything to hurt me in any way but I would still rather she talked instead of completely disconnecting from me.